A Letter of Encouragement

It’s been a rough week. Depression snuck up again and has been holding me down for several days. I’ve come to realize that I am really good at giving encouragement to others…but not so good at encouraging myself. So I decided to do a little roleplaying. I’ve written this letter to myself as if I was writing to a friend. It’s scary to post this because it requires vulnerability, but I wanted to put it out there in case anyone else can find encouragement from something in this letter, too.

Dear Friend,

I am so sorry that you’re going through this. I’ve been there before and it sucks.

Whenever I’m feeling down that’s when the negative voices in my head grow louder. In case those false voices are starting to tell you lies, I want to drive them out by reminding you of the TRUTH.

You ARE good enough. You are NOT inadequate.

My dear, you are so beautiful inside and out. You have such gifts to offer this world. You are talented. You are skillful. I know that even now you still sometimes get frustrated with your personality type and wonder if you would have been better off if you were born someone else…but STOP that thinking right now! Your personality is rare and unique. It is beautifully complex.

Remember that every personality type has it’s own different strengths and weaknesses. You’re only feeling down because the strengths of some other personality types (where you are weak) are what seem to be most valued in your culture. But remember that YOU also have strengths that THEY do NOT have. Where you are weak, they are strong. Where they are weak, you are strong. That’s one of the most beautiful things about humanity. We all fit together like one giant puzzle or different parts of one body. Each piece has its place and purpose and each body part is a necessary part of the whole. YOU uniquely have something to offer the world. Remember your strengths and stop beating yourself up over your weaknesses. Everyone has weaknesses. Your weaknesses aren’t “worse”; they’re just different. Don’t forget about the amazing strengths you have.

Your dreams are not a waste of time!

I know some days you view your multipotentiality as a curse, but it is a true blessing! I’ve heard people say that they wished they could have just a fraction of the talent you have. Not everyone has those abilities and even fewer have multiple abilities like you do. I know you fear you will become a “jack of all trades and a master of none” and that you won’t amount to anything; that you are wasting your time fueling multiple passions and will never be “good enough” at any of them. But I see it as a precious gift. Yes, those artists may be farther ahead than you, but they also can’t make music like you and write like you. Yes, those guitarists may be more skillful than you, but they also can’t draw or write or even sing like you. They chose their singular path. It’s ok…no, it’s GREAT that you chose to not give up on what you love to do. You have a passion for multiple areas and that is beautiful. That is a gorgeous part of who you are. And with time you will master all of the skills you are passionate about with hard work and determination. It will all be worth it.

You have friends you can trust And you are NOT a burden.

I know you have a hard time sharing your struggles with others. You’re used to carrying everyone else’s burdens and doing everything you can to help them, but rarely receive the same in return. You care SO much about others and you wouldn’t ever want to be a burden to anyone so you keep your hurts to yourself and suffer in silence. You pretend to be fine so you can continue helping and uplifting others. You are scarily good at being fake happy; no one sees anything but what you want them to see. But this isolates you. This makes you feel so lonely. And you don’t have to go through this alone.

You know that there are people who care about you. So why do you worry so much about being a burden to them? I’m sure you have friends who are SO ready to help you. Friends who have been blessed by what you’ve done for them and would be HAPPY to repay your kindness by being there for you. So why do you fear being a burden? Perhaps you know that some would do anything for you, but you know they have their own stuff they’re going through and you can’t help but silently sacrifice yourself for them. But you don’t have to. You’ve done enough. You’ve done SO much to help others. So why won’t you let anyone help you? As I said, I’m sure there are so many who would not only help you but be SO happy to show you the kindness that you’ve shown them. LET THEM love you. They WANT to love you. Because they DO LOVE you!

I know you also have trouble trusting people. I’m so proud of you because I know you’ve come such a long way and grown in this area…but you still sometimes won’t let people in because you’re afraid they’ll hurt you. That you’ll finally open up to someone and then they’ll drop you as a friend the next day and you’ll regret having shared so much of yourself with them. You’re scared they won’t be able to help and that will put them or you in an awkward position. I know you have good reason for why you’re slow to trust and I really admire your intuition in knowing other people. But I suggest you take another look at your friends. Why are you so scared to open up to them? And really, what’s the worst that could happen? They laugh at you? You know they wouldn’t do that. They don’t understand? Well that could happen, but so what? They can still offer comfort. They look at you differently? Well that’s their problem, not yours. They walk out of your life? Then don’t regret having opened up because it was good practice in letting yourself be vulnerable. What’s the worst that could happen?…But what’s the BEST that could happen if you trust them? They listen. They may even relate to what you said. They encourage you and may even have just the right thing to say to help you or give you a new insight. Your friendship could even deepen. You’ll get to really feel their love more than before. So let your friends be your friend!

You CAN help people.

I also know one reason why you often keep things to yourself is because you’re afraid that if you let people see your weakness then they’ll reject you and your wisdom forever. That you’ll ruin your chances of ever being able to help anyone. THAT IS A LIE.

And as I said before—you have SO much to offer others. So why do you doubt that you can help people? You’ve already helped so many people! You can be certain of this because they’ve freakin’ TOLD YOU with their own lips! If you’ve helped people before (even before you knew what you know now because I know you’ve been growing and learning over the years), then of course you’ll be able to continue helping people! Your smile has brightened so many people’s days. Your kind words have lifted spirits! Your encouragement has helped others see the good in themselves. You’ve empowered. You’ve inspired. You’ve helped so many people. You CAN help people. So don’t give up.

I hope these words encourage you, my friend. Don’t ever forget that I believe in you. You are an amazing human being. You are a good friend. People love you. I love you. You are not alone. Everyone has their own struggles, their own battles to fight, and their own doubts about themselves. So don’t you dare beat yourself up for that. And don’t listen to the lies. Don’t forget who you REALLY are. Because YOU are wonderful and the world is a better place with YOU IN IT. 

Love,

Your Friend

Need more encouragement?

• A Letter of Encouragement for When a Friend Abandons You
• A Letter of Encouragement to the Helper Who Needs Help

Want to choose my next Letter of Encouragement topic?

My patrons on Patreon get to make suggestions and vote on my Letter of Encouragement topics. You can become a patron for even just $1 a month. Every little bit helps me in my mission to continue creating and sharing free content to help others in their journeys of growth.